5/26/2005 11:16:00 AM
Thursday, May 26, 2005
"There is only one attitude to have in basketball and that is willingness to learn and improve at all time. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Every great player has had their share of difficult times and hurdles to overcome, but what makes them different from those that fail is their determination to be better..Basketball is a team game and you can only achieve success at the highest levels through teamwork and togetherness. The team that plays individuals will always fail against the team those players together... bleh bleh.... and so on...." (Extracted from Shih Chi's blog)
Hmmm... While i was reading this, suddenly felt so much... It reminded me of the daes when i fail and tried pulling myself up together and tried again... Played as a team... Even though we had matches which we are more likely to lose, we gave our veri best shot as a team and managed to defeat the teams... Of cos there're times where we lost too... But the pleasure of playing as a team is realli unbelievable...
But given that i've stopped basketball today and reading wat she's wrote let me realised that i've done all the things that lead me to failure... That's y i gave up i believe cos the failures has totally dashed my confidence and i dun wanna put myself through all these again... Let me do some reflection:
1stly, I've focussed to much on " I, me and myself"... My performance... My chances... Etc etc...
2ndly, I've deproved... I dun play as well anymore... Haix... Get more and more demoralised... Wished time go back to my JC2 year...
3rdly, forget it lahx... I shall juz escape... Stop bball all together and hope i'd be happier... Erm... Did i??? Dun tink so...
So... That's y i'm here... I used to be a success i muz sae but now, i'm a complete failure... But life gotta go on... I'll find my success somewhere else ba... I know i dun haf teh forte to play basketball... I'm nv a sports person... Juz tt i put in extra effort, train extra hard and tk extra long time... But success is alwaz the killer of a good player ba... Cos a successful person is more likely to be unable to face failure isn't it...
5/25/2005 02:28:00 AM
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Wonder wat's wrong wif me... Y do i feel so damn unlucky recently... I woke up veri early this morning hoping to call Sun;ove and get the clinicals details... But when i called, the person was on MC till nxt week... I requested to speak to someone who can answer my enquiry... And guess wat... I was shoot off... The person on the line whoever that lao auntie was (at least she sounded lk 1), said i shld get all the info frm my lecturer and previous students juz turn up... I realli tink she's a damn grouchy women manx... Hopefully when i'm over for clinicals i won't need to work closely wif her... Hope she's not an OT and hope even mroe she won't be my supervising therapist... Else i can juz kill myself though i realli haf absolutely no idea who she is... Although i'm juz a student dun treat us lk dirt... Who noes we'll be colleagues one of these daes... Or i might b ur superior... Though i'm q doubtful... But nonetheless i tink she's an arrogant ass...Den in the noon i'm suppose to go out... And guess wat... I 4ogt to bring my ez link card along... Waste my money buy single trip ticket which definitely cost more den using my ez link card... Irritating... Y Y Y??? Y so suay... Cannot understand at all... Hmmm...And recently i dunnoe y i juz can't get to slp... My eyes feel tired but my mind thinks alot... Cannot slp... Look at the time now... It's almost 3 and i'm stil online... Slping late results in agin leh... Ahhhh~ I dun wanna lk so chao lao.. How??? And i realli need to readjust back else when clinicals strt i'll probably be falling aslp... Tt's not wat i wan.. Arghx... Nevertheless, got a good news todae... Got back my results... Hmmm... Suprisingly i got Dist for my clinicals... It realli came as a suprise to me cos i seriously dun tink i did well in my CE2... But it's a gd news rite... And my suspicion of failing my COP is my hallucination afterall... I got a C+... The rest of the modules din exactly fail me, of cos except for my OTTP... Though i'm not sure if CGH will wanna kill me but i'm q happie wif my reslts... Cos i expected alot worse... Can sm1 help me doze off??? I need to meet Kui Shin at 10am at sch wor... And i need to slp realli... Else i'm gonna become a old women... Ahhh~~~~~~
5/22/2005 12:38:00 PM
Sunday, May 22, 2005
It's a bad start of the dae... It's suppose to be a public holidae... shouldn't i be happie... Though i doesn't exactly make a difference to me cos afterall i'm having holidae rite now... But no... I'm not the least bit of happie... Alwaz hated public holidae cos the whole family would be at hm... Mayb i'm gu pi ba... But i juz feel that they keep irritating me when they're at hm... I juz wan sm peace b4 i strt preparing 4 clinicals... Can't they even grant me this wish???
Strted the dae being awoken by sm inconsiderate ppl disgusting singing... Oh... Did i sae singing... Or shld i sae they're slaughterign chicken... Den when i woke up cannot even haf sm peace... My um ask me help her ba(2) Heng Cai (A type of vege)... I swear i'll hate this kinda vege from todae onwards man... It's the most irritating and difficult to deal wif kind of vege... It took me the whole morning to finish plucking it... Can nv understand... It's not as if there's special nutrition in this vege which u cannot find in other vege... Y muz they irritate me wif this kinda vege...
Arghx... Gimme a break.. Stop irritating me PLEASE!!! Oh well... No programme for the noon and no programme for 2ml.. .Damn bored... Need to wait till Tue b4 i noe wat i can read up for my clinicals... And i can tell u i'm not in the mood to prepare for clinicals... Thanks to the lecturers for telling us everythg so late and i cannot spread out to prepare...
Arghx... Everythg is geting on my nerves... Haf u ever felt that everythg is getting on ur nerves nomatter how ridiculous ur irritation is... The feeling isn't good but i'm realli DAMN irritated!!!
5/18/2005 01:40:00 AM
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Hahax... Dun be scareded by the title of my blog... Juz that i went to meet my fren juz now... And they decided to bring me go dou feng in their bike... 1st of all i tink i realli dun trust her... 2ndly, i really think she no safety awareness of herself and her passenger... Thus when she finally let me dwn, all i wanted to sae is i'm so gld nthg happedn to me during the short trip... Hahax...Anyway, i conquered another set of vcd 2dae... Hmmm... Actualli the show is not bad lahx... But i tink it's me... I hate watching shows which show people dying more and more... It juz reminds me how vulnerable human are... And how unpredictable life is...Oh no!!! How m i going to work in the healthcare profession... I'm strting to doubt my ability more and more le... Shitz... Hahax... Oh well... Tink Jojo they all are now on the bus going up cameron highland and i'm here bz conquering my vcds... Hahax... Hope that they enjoy and tell me about their trip when they're back... Hahax...
5/17/2005 02:57:00 AM
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Hmmmm... 2dae i realised how fast human change... And many a times these changes are those that i dun wish to see... Mayb i juz cannot accept the fact that human changes so fast... Of cos i'm sure i've changed alot over the past few months ba... Human are contantly changing and evolving ba...
Many of my frenz haf changed since the last time i see dem... Went to KTV 2dae with a couple of frenz whom we did not meet for quite a long time... And I met a fren whom I've probably not met for dunnoe how long... We used to be veri close... The key word is "used to be"... Meaning we're no longer close... In fact i muz sae i hardly noe her anymore... We hardly speak a single word to each other... Mayb dunnoe wat to sae or dunnoe how to face each other ba... But i dun understand when and wat made her picked up smoking... Mayb it's the world... We're afterall from two different world ba... She stopped sch and strted working... Mayb it's the people ard her that influence her ba... Afterall frm the dae i noe her she's so vulnerable to the factors affecting her... All except me... Though we used to be veri close but i nv succeeded talking sense into her... Is it that afterall negative influence is stronger than positive ones???
How are we as OT suppose to influence ppl positively if there're so much negative influence around???
I guess even though we hardly speak to each other anymore but i still feel sad that she's leading such an unhealthy life... Allowing herself to fall into the evil crutches of the cigarates... Nvm... It alwaz happens... I alwaz feel upset when i see my fren taking all the unhealthy habits... Esp smoking... I'm q an anti-smoker... Mayb it's cos of my childhood influence ba... Hopefullt my frenz ard me can use their brain to think for themselves ba... Stop hurting ur own body... Dun be so vulnerable to influence ba... !!!
5/14/2005 10:05:00 PM
Saturday, May 14, 2005
2dae was a total crap... After getting use to having too much night life and slping late, i slpt at ard 3 last nite... And guess what... Got a stupid SHS conference which i'm suppose to turn upearly in the moning at 8.30 in school... Which means i can onli slp lk damn short... And this result in my bad headache the whole afternoon all the wae till now!!! Juz took the medication but y doesn't it seems to be working... Arghx... Cure my pain pls!!!!
And it's not juz the headache tt spoils the dae...My beloved mummy... For god knows reason lock the gate wif the lock which i dun haf keys to access to... Which means i'm stuck outside the house... Out of desperation not to look damn pathetic outside the house, i went over to Yee Tin's house... And slp of cos... But i tink not having the comfort of ur own environment juz compromise the quality of slp... Thus the slp did not cure my headache... In fact, for god knows reason, it made it worse... Oh my god...
But nvm... Though 2dae was sucky but yesterdae was fine at least... Though the movie "The HouseOf Wax" totally gross me out... I know i'm easily sickened by psychotic people... Can nv understand their mindset... And this show is realli about two psychotic guy... And the way they killed the people is realli gross... Oh fine... Mayb to some ppl not that gross lahx... But it's me leh... Totalli cannot take it...
After the movie we went to eat Sakae sushi buffet... But apparently i tink the movie made me fan(3) wei(4)... Hahax... Den din eat much.. Nv eat out fill... Went to tk neoprint and it din turn out nice... Waste my money...
Spent alot of money on god noes wat...
Ahhh!!! come to think of it yesterdae wasn't exactly fantastic either... Duh~
5/09/2005 12:40:00 AM
Monday, May 09, 2005
Smtimes watching the basketball competition will juz bring me back to missing the good old days when i had a loving team which i could stand up for and play for... Remember those daes when i played 7 days a week and yet i'm totally happie... Remembered the times when there's mo excuse for not gg for trainin... Not even if i'm sick... But i've got plenty of reasons for not gg to sch and not studying for tests... And i'm bz wif basketball till ppl muz book me in advance to meet me... And by the wae i might turn u dwn last minute aso... And not forgetting the interesting training camps that i'll forever look forward to... Nomatter how tired i m at the end of the dae i'll still spend the rest of the energy playing stupid games wif my teammates and doing stupid thgs tt caused us to get into trouble... Recollecting the match which i miss most... My JC2 final match against SA fighting for 3rd and 4th... The best match i played and alot of happie and funnie incidents though tt was realli a tough match... That was the good old daes...
Y did i suddenly recollect??? Cos 2dae i went to watch Singapore's cup finals... Though i dunnoe which country Jordan came from but the other team is the Sydney's team... They're realli bravoic... Super zhun, super bia... And i keep asking how many balls they shoot each dae during trainin... Hahax...
But i'm realli sad to sae that at the end of the dae, the good old daes are realli old daes... We can't cling on to the old daes and refuse to let go... We need to let it go and look forward to wat's ahead of us... Even though my life is no longer as bz as b4... But i've got to look for thgs to keep myself occupied... Even though i still could not find anythg tt could let my passion burn like b4 but i still need interests and hobbies... Cos "Occupation" is needed for good health and well-being... Wahx... Realli study too mcuh le... Hahax...
But it's realli crap if i tell u tt i realli feel nthg for basketball anymore... It's true that i might no longer b as passionate... It might be true that i might no longer be as crazy and as good... And most importantly i know i could no longer find a team liek what i use to haf and enjoy the team as much as the team i had few years ago... But it forever feels so good when u're playing on court... Non-competitive for me now... It juz makes u feel "HIGH"... Realli high... Mayb tt's y atheletes dun need drugs... Cos the sports itself is a natural dose of drugs... Even till this dae, i believe that basketball is still my favourite... Even though i might not haf played the sports for ages!!!
5/01/2005 11:54:00 PM
Sunday, May 01, 2005
Oh... I juz realised i've not been posting for like 1 weeks... Y??? Cos there's nthg happening in my life for the past week... M bz preparing for my LLD paper... Bz preparing??? Like real... Actualli i'm not bz preparing at all... I muz sae instead of bz preparing, i've got absolutely no mood to study... Ahhh!!! Wat's happening to me... Wat virus did i contract... Y did i become like this... Haix...
2dae was suppose to finish many topics... But went to watch Women's cup instead... So here i m still stuck wif the last topic at such a late hour... And 2ml i'm gg to Sentosa... Smtimes i juz wonder if i can stop pampering myself and get dwn to work... Tink all this necessary socialisation is killing me... Wonder if i'm back in Japan... Y are these socialisation so important??? Cos these frenz are those whom i hardly met up wif... Haix... Oh well oh well...
I've to finish my topic on Anger Management... I'm planning to revise wat i've studied earlier in the week... But m damn lazy... Dun even noe if i've got the time... Haix... Y exam sux such a big deal... Realli wondering how i would fare for my semester... Hahax...
Better stop slacking online and do smthg abt my work ba... Gonna go study le... I'm determined to slack after LLD paper!!!